Leaving You
by Ayotechnology
Summary: Kanou, thinking that he is forcing Ayase to stay with him, decided to finally let him go. He thinks that it would make his precious lover happy after all, Ayase hates him. Unfortunately, what Kanou thought to make Ayase happy is killing him.
1. Chapter 1: The Unwanted Phone Call

Summary: Kanou, thinking that he is forcing Ayase to stay with him, decided to finally let him go. He thinks that it would make his precious lover happy after all, Ayase hates him. Unfortunately, what Kanou thought to make Ayase happy is killing him. Will Ayase be able to stop Kanou from leaving him or will they both forever live in misery and misunderstanding?

Author's note: I just want to tell the world how happy I am at seeing that FINALLY there is a section for Okane ga nai fanfics. Thank you so much.

Warning: Yaoi (boy x boy relationship). Please leave if you are in doubt of your openness to same sex love relationship.

Disclaimer: I do not own Okane ga nai.

* * *

Chapter 1: The Unwanted Phone Call

Rrrring……rrringgg……

Ayase looked at the caller I.D…..

It is coming from Kanou-san's office……

The blond boy enthusiastically picked up the phone but to his dismay it is not his lover who is calling but

"Ayase-san, Kanou shachou wants me to tell you that he wouldn't be coming home for the next five days."

"Kuba-san, doshite, what do you mean by that?" He can't help but sound so broken while talking to the older man.

"Ayase-san, uhm…Kanou shachou has a lot of things on his mind now, aaah ahh I mean, he has a lot of things to do here in the office. You know, meetings here and there." Kuba sweat dropped as he saw his boss eyed him heatedly as if saying _Say one more word not in the script and you're gonna get it._

"Kuba-san, let me talk to Kanou-san, I know he is there, I wouldn't be surprised if he's right there beside you, onegai, please let me talk to him, why is he hiding from me? He hasn't come home for the past two weeks!!!!Please, Kuba-san, I'm begging you. I don't even know where he sleeps nowadays."

"Nnno he can't ahh I mean he's not here," Misao Kuba was starting to find it hard to choose between complying to either his boss' wishes or to the broken boy's on the other line. _Shoot, Misao, calm down, you will lose your job if you don't do as shachou says. _

"Wwwhat did I do, Kuba-san to make him avoid me?

"Listen, he told me, that is, before he left that your needs be still supplied. You will be brought to school at exactly 7 30 in the morning and you will be fetched at around 4 30. Starting from now on, you don't have to ask permission from shachou whenever you want to go out with your classmates at school. He just requests that you let your body guards accompany you when you decided to go home."

"Wwwhat I don't get all of this? Again, my question was why is he avoiding me? Why can't he tell me all of this straight to my face?" He wasn't usually this rude when talking to somebody else but he just can't help acting upon his instincts.

"That is all, Ayase-san, have a nice day." Kuba was struggling keeping his voice as neutral as possible. He can't afford to give into the boy's cries.

Ayase broke into sobs, "Matte, wait, does he not love anymore?"

"Gomen, I'm sorry, Ayase, I can't answer any of your questions. I am simply doing my work."

"Hhai, I understand, please tell him I miss him."

"Yyes, I will."

Click…..

"You've done a great job, Misao Kuba. You and your brother will receive a raise starting from now on" Kanou was staring out the window, sighing as he says his next words, "How is he? Is he doing well?"

"Shachou, you heard him, he sounds so…" Misao was choosing his words carefully, afraid of angering his boss any further. For the past two weeks, his boss was having a fit every now and then despite the fact the good news that their company grew significantly larger from the past year.

"It's okay, tell me. I wouldn't blame you if you say that I'm the jerk here."

Seeing his shachou so humbled and so broken, Misao couldn't help but bow his head so low, "Boss, he feels really distress about this whole ordeal, but I promise I will not betray your trust and support you all the way even though you wouldn't increase our salary. I'm sure my brother thinks the same."

"My brother's right, we will try our best to guard Ayase and keep your location a mystery as much as we can," Kuba Homare finally voiced out his sentiments for he too, can't stand seeing his shachou like this.

"Thank you so much, you guys don't have any idea how your words brighten up my day." Kanou smiled at the two men in front of him, "you guys are dismiss and don't come in until I tell you, understood?" His face then went back to their usual coldness.

The two men then left the president's room silently.

"Ayase, I hope that you'd be happy with my decision. I simply want you to be happy and I would prove that to you by giving up my own happiness---by leaving you. I love you so much and I can't stand seeing you suffering anymore because of me."

* * *

10: 00 pm…

Ayase woke up from a terrible nightmare, getting terribly depressed at seeing his lover not by his side for the 15th night. Preventing himself from crying, he forced himself out of bed, determined to pay a visit to his lover, hoping to settle things once and for all.

One thing he didn't know is that things wouldn't be as easy as he thought…..and things aren't showing any signs of getting better any time soon.

* * *

A/N: Comments or suggestions? I would like to hear from you guys. Hope this chapter sparks your interest in reading more. I would pay close attention to all of the reviews. Homophobic reviews are gladly NOT entertained.


	2. Chapter 2: Leaving You

Author's note: For every chapter beginnings, I make it a habit to thank my reviewers namely Ralyena Starrling, see1like, Kit Of Light And Dark, patty, KatMiko11, Onige-a, Imaginings, wara ningyo, Purely Fake Innocence, and last but not the least, demon_wolf. Thank you also to readers who alerted and favorited this story, I hope this chapter will be as entertaining as the first chapter to all of you. Good Luck and have fun reading.

Warning: Yaoi (boy x boy relationship). Please leave if you are in doubt of your openness to same sex love relationship.

Disclaimer: I do not own Okane ga nai.

* * *

Chapter 2: Seeing You Once Again

"Ayase-kun, I think you should head home, it's getting late and the boss hasn't returned yet."

"Iye, I will wait for him and besides, Homare-san, I think you should be the one who is suppose to head home." Ayase politely smiled but Homare knew was starting to feel guilty once again for lying to the young boy, for being the one who was assigned to tell him that his lover was leaving him.

"Uhm, Homare-san, gomen, I'm sorry for screaming at you over the phone a while ago. I know you were just following orders but I........,uhm, I've been meaning to ask you something."

Homare held his breathe for he knew where this conversation was heading to and prayed that somebody would take him away from this awkward situation. He hated the fact that he instinctively was starting to come up with a lie to the question that the young boy was just about to ask.

"As you may have known, Kanou-san's not coming home for the past two weeks and when he called me back then just to tell me that he wasn't going to come home for the night. Right then, I wanted so much to ask him as to where he was headed to but I resisted the urge to do so because....he might think that I couldn't fend for myself, that I'm such a weakling. And then,"

Homare could hear the subtle sniffing from the young man across him and felt the need to comfort him.

"the next night was worse.....I stayed up late, awaiting for his return but he didn't show up and this continued for the next four nights," Ayase could barely keep his tears at bay, reminiscing the tortuous hours he spent, hopelessly waiting, "and finally he called, just to tell me that he would be gone for the next few days and told me not to worry."

"Homare, are you in here?" Misao scanned the room, obviously annoyed at his twin, "aren't you suppose to be downstairs....? Oh, Ayase-kun, I'm sorry I didn't notice you're here. Homare, you should have informed me about Ayase here instead of making me wait for you."

"Gomen, Misao-san, it was my fault.....," Ayase cut off, "I should be getting home as well....ano, if you please excuse me...."

"Matte, wait Ayase, you should perhaps, come with us, so that we could drop you off at the apartment."

"Homare-san, did Kanou-san asked you to do that?"

"Hhhai, Ayase-kun, demo, but he......."

"Don't worry about it, I wouldn't impose again like I did over the phone," Ayase smile reassuringly.

_I just hope that he tells me the reason as to why he's avoiding me._

* * *

"Thanks, Misao-san, Homare-san for seeing me off."

"You are very welcome. Ja, so see you tomorrow?"

"Mmmm...."

"Okay then, oyasumi, good night, Ayase," with that said, the twins drove off, without first making sure that the blond was safely inside the apartment.

_Inside the apartment......Ayase's POV_

"So, what to do first? Do I cook or take a bath a first?"

Finally, after staring at nothing in particular for a long time, he opted to make himself a meal first. Next, he went straight for the bathroom, fixing himself a hot bath before hopping in the tub. _That's right Ayase, everything is alright, I can very well handle myself. This is my normal life. This is what I wished for so long, right?_ After scrubbing himself clean, Ayase put on his favorite set of sleeping attire and went straight for bed.

Absentmindedly, running his hands over the expanse of white sheet, he plopped himself face down on the mattress. _I want this right? This is my life, mine alone. I...I should be happy._

"_Ayase, please don't wait for me anymore, I wouldn't be home tonight......."_

_That's right, I was happy when he said those words. _

"_Uhm Ayase-kun, ah, gomen for not coming home for the last four nights. Jaaa, I just want to let you know that I might not be coming home tonight."_

_This is what I want.......finally I got it.......Kami-sama arigatou gozaimasu._

"_....And the following days as well.."_

_Demo, but why do I feel that something vital to my existence has been taken away from me. Why do I feel heaviness and emptiness at the same time?_

_And......why is my face wet? What is this flowing from my eyes? Oh no, please stop, this is not how a happy person should act right? Unless I'm crying from happiness. Yes, that's right, these are tears of joy....Finally, I can sleep happily tonight for the first time since I was abducted._

"_Ayase-kun, you are special to me."_

_The past few weeks are the best days of my life._

"_I want to be the most important person in your life."_

_I love my freedom_

_but....._

_I love Kan---_

_more??_

* * *

The next day...

"Arigatou, thanks for the ride," Ayase politely bowed in front of the twins, "I guess you two should be heading to the office, right?"

"Uhm, please be careful, Ayase-kun, if anything happens, remember....."

"To call you any time," Ayase butted in playfully, "Homare-san, I get it already, you are starting to sound like a broken recorder, I'm just fine by myself. Jaaa, see you guys later."

Rest assured that the young blond was nowhere in sight, the nonchalant twin spoke. "I can safely assume that we are thinking the same." He then, placed his hand on the other's left shoulder, silently providing comfort to the other. "Homare, I hope you don't get too mixed up in this whole mess. Remember that we are just the boss' employees no matter how much we are trusted. It is not our business to interrupt with their lives." _Plus the fact that I hate to see you like this.....depressed and disheartened. What happen to the perky old brother that cared for me when Mom and Dad died?_

Not used to Misao's ministrations, Homare stared long at the hand on his left shoulder, thankful that his younger twin understood him. "I know demo, but I just can't help but feel that something's wrong with Ayase today."

Misao sighed. _Guess, we will soon get mixed up in this mess, that is, if we are not yet involved. Damn you, Homare, no matter how much I want to get out of your side, I can't; I just have to be by your side no matter what whether I like it or not. _"Well, he's smiling as usual and there's nothing wrong with him physically. But to tell the truth, I did notice that he sure does recover easily from a break up. Isn't that what the shachou wants?"

"I know but......"

"But it's getting late and we have to report for work or else, shachou might think that we are taking advantage of our 'alone time' with his precious Ayase."

"Yeah, you're right, ikuyo, let's go. Please remind me that we have to be at school at around 11 30 to fetch Ayase."

"Hmm, as if you'd forget, you do know that classes end at 12 right?"

"I know, just making sure."

Misao simply rolled his eyes.

* * *

Recess time....

Ayase was starting to shiver. Ever since this morning, he felt as if someone was following him. He kept on making detours and even dared talked to the bullies in the school just so he wouldn't be alone.

"Hey, so you want to hang out with us? Hmmph, as if we'd let a girl in our team."

"Demo, but I'm not a gi...," Ayase refrained from telling his real gender for he might get ridiculed on the spot, "I mean I just want to make friends."

"Oh really, becoming our friend means that you do what we want."

"Uhm....." _Maybe this wasn't a good idea after all._

"Why not strip for us, bitch?"

_No way, _"I I think I have to go....classes are starting soon."

"Oh no you don't, we still have time, lots of time." one of the thugs grabbed Ayase by the shoulder.

"Please, I beg you let me go." _I have to get away, how do I do it?_

And just like that, Ayase's hand was set free. _I can't believe it. Did I just....._

Krinnggggg....krrringgggg

"Oh no, I have to go....."

Ayase ran as fast as his short legs could take him. He arrived to class just before the bell stopped ringing. But the dreaded feeling of somebody watching him still lingers. _No way, is it because of my stalker, that those thugs let go of me?_

_What am I gonna do? Should I call Homare-san? But, I don't want to bother other people anymore. I want to be independent. I promise myself that I wouldn't be a burden or a pushover anymore. But what if........_

He wasn't able to pay attention well to his classes that day and the succeeding days......

Until one day, he finally snapped....as he was staring at himself in the mirror.

_Ayase, remember, you are a man, no matter what others think of you. You are brave and you must confront whoever's following you. This can't go on. Always remember to keep a straight face, don't fret, don't quiver, and most of all, don't run. Act as if every thing's normal._

Knock...knock.....

"Ayase, are you done? It's almost 7:00 and we might encounter traffic along the way."

"Coming Homare-san....."

_Remember, confront the stalker, don't ask help from the twins. _

* * *

Break time.....

_Calm down, Ayase, calm down. You can do this. _He could feel his body turning cold at the thought of following a stranger. Plus the fact that he is now in one of the secluded areas inside the campus. His left hand gripping the mobile phone inside his pocket, preparing to dial the twins' number just in case. _What if that person is a bad guy? Am I going to get hurt here or worse, am I going to die? _

His sadistic thoughts were cut short as he heard a rustling sound behind him. He immediately turned around and saw his stalker that haunted him for the past few days. _Masaka, no way, it can't be......_

Before he could stop himself, he screamed a name that he thought he would never utter again for the rest of his life. The name that he strived so hard to forget, the person whose existence he repressed so well until today.

"KANOU-SAN, MATTE, WAIT, WHA---DOSHITE, WHY ARE YOU AVOIDING ME, PLEASE DON'T GO....WAIT." At that very moment, his entire being was focused on chasing after this man, that nothing mattered to him anymore. Unfortunately, his legs doesn't seem to cooperate with his wishes. As a result, he fell face down the grassy earth but not without seeing three men entering a black limousine.

"KANOU-SAN, HOMARE-SAN, MISAO-SAN, MATTE, PLEASE, DON'T GO....."

He was answered by the roaring of the engine which signaled the car's departure.

And for the first time in five days, Ayase cried. He never even bothered to get up from his fall. All the things he worked hard for; all the independent act, all the manly attitude---all of these went to waste. _I can't do this anymore. I have to see him. Does that mean I couldn't imagine a life without him? Does that mean that I'm forever dependent? _"NO NO NO, DAMN IT, DAMN IT!!!!" _Why why am I so desperate to see him??? I was fine before he showed up. _

But he already knew the answer way way before. He just couldn't admit it to himself what his mind and body had been telling him since eons ago. After all, he couldn't see himself crying nor could he hear himself screaming the other's name in his sleep. He never dared acknowledged the feeling, not even to himself. The feeling that he intentionally mistaken for dependency; the need for survival, for protection. And sex only serve as a payment for all of these. Alas, he couldn't deny it anymore, every fiber of his being was screaming at him, to wake up, to open his eyes and face the truth once and for all that.....

He love being touched and kissed by his benefactor, that those ministrations were more than just a form of payment, that these actions are what people who are in love give to each other.

_I have to find him._

These five words were enough to make Ayase get up and be encouraged to settle things with his lover once and for all.

* * *

Kanou's office......

"Ayase, onegai, please don't go in there."

"Homare-san, you're neither my guardian nor my keeper. I'm already nineteen and I should be the one dictating myself for what I want to do with my life. And what I want now is to see him. I WANT TO SEE HIM NOW!!!"

"Ayase-kun, please listen to onii-san, and tone down your voice for there are people still working at this time."

"NO and that's final, I would go inside and talk with your boss once and for all." And in an blink of an eye, the young blond was already dashing towards the main elevator, headed for the topmost floor.

"Well, Homare, should we inform the boss then?"

"Yeah, I think we should."

* * *

"Kanou-san, I demand you to open this door right now. Don't try to pretend that you're not in there. I just saw you at school this morning."

_As expected, no answer...._

"Kanou-san, OPEN THE DOOR!!!!" His knuckles are already starting to hurt from the incessant knocking but he couldn't care less about that now, especially if it meant seeing his lover for the first time in three weeks.

_Still, no reply.....from the man on the other side of the door..._

"Kanou-san, why are you avoi..."

_No, Ayase, don't ask him about that. If you do, he'll think that you are such a weakling...._

"Please open the door," he softly pleaded to the other man. _But what if he doesn't want to see me anymore. I can live with that right? I...I just want to know the reason as to why he left me. No no no, I will not ask him that, I..I have...._

"Why are you avoiding me?" There he finally said it only to be answered by.....

Silence.....

He felt stupid. No, he felt like crap. He just set aside his pride and bravely confessed his weakness, only to realize that the other doesn't give a thing to what he has to say.

That was the final straw. He could feel himself getting annoyed by the second and instead of knocking, he started banging on the door as if his life and sanity depended on it.

And after a few minutes.....his banging finally bore fruit.

"Ayase,"

The young blond couldn't take his eyes off his supposed lover. He simply stared there, awestruck at seeing the man who was the object of his nightmares for the past few weeks. To the surprise of both men, Ayase hurled himself to the man in front of him. Touching and hugging whatever part he could touch, desperate for the other's warmth.

"Do you have any idea how loud you are?" the older of the two asked pretending to reprimand the guy in front of him, but nevertheless, was more than happy to see Ayase once again face to face. _It's been quite a while._

The young boy didn't speak, he just stayed there hugging his lover fervently like there's no tomorrow. _What am I doing? I'm such a wimp._

Kanou heaved a sigh._ Guess he wouldn't get an answer from the boy tonight. That was to be expected right? After all, this relationship was only meant to be one sided in the first place._ He wanted so much to kiss and ravish the boy in front of him but he restrained himself. Instead he carried the fragile being with both of his hands inside his office before shutting the door.

They simply stayed there. None of them dared to break the silence. Each engrossed with their own trail of thought.

This lasted for several minutes and eventually, someone had to break the ice.

"I think we should head home," Kanou whispered to the young blond.

Ayase's only response was a nod before burying his face at the crook of his lover's neck. _I never want to leave this warmth ever again. _

Kanou caught himself smiling at the gesture. _Ayase, aishiteru, I love you, and it pains me to leave you. I hate doing this but it would be best for you to stay away from me. You don't deserve this kind of treatment. But Kami-sama, please grant me one more wish even just for tonight...._

Knock...knock....

"Shachou, the car's ready."

"Thank you, Kuba-san, have you gotten the vial?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Good, hand it to me later once we reached the apartment."

* * *

Inside the apartment.....

Kanou carefully settled Ayase on the bed. He scanned through the surroundings and noticed that nothing had changed. Every thing's still in order. He went to the kitchen and prepared two glasses of wine.

"KANOU-SAN!!!" He almost berated himself from screaming like a girl and for falling asleep at the wrong time. _What if he left while I was dozing off? I can't I can't lose him again!!_

"Ayase, are you okay?"

"Hhhai."

Kanou noticed the trembling figure of the younger man. _After all this time, he still hasn't warmed up to me. Don't worry Ayase, sooner or later, you'll be totally free from this torture._

"Uhm, perhaps you'd like to eat with me first before going to bed."

Ayase couldn't help but notice the lack of attention his lover's giving him. There were no touching, no caresses, not even a consistent eye contact. Nothing....as if they were never....never in love. Ayase couldn't stop himself from choking but at least, he was able to restrain his tears from falling.

Instead of comforting his lover, Kanou turned away from the boy. _Shit, why do I always have to scare him like that? I have to get this over with or else......._

"Ano, I think that would be nice." _Please look at me, Kanou-san._

"I'll see you at the dining table then." _I can't even look at him, he sounded so broken. Damn you, Kanou, how could you do this to him?_

"Okay." And then Kanou left leaving Ayase to nurse his battered heart.

After an hour or less......

The blond boy was already dead drunk. As usual, it was Kanou who would carry him to bed while listening to the blond's slurred murmurings of wanting more alcohol.

Kanou gently settled the young blond on the bed, making sure not to move the boy too much. He always found a drunk Ayase irresistible and tonight was no exception. _Ayase, you don't have any idea as to what I'm planning to do you to you now and I wouldn't dare tell you for you might just run away from me._

He then proceeded to remove his neck tie, his shirt, until he was half naked. _Ayase, forgive me, just this once, let me....._

He knew what he was doing was immoral. Forcing and raping a teenager who is almost a decade younger than him is a formidable sign of how desperate he is for this boy, that he will go as far as to sacrifice his morality.

"Ayase," he whispered, "don't fall asleep yet." Without bothering to wait for the other's reply, he began stripping the young boy of his PJs while at the same time, trailing soft kisses and caressing the already exposed body parts of the boy.

This part is called the point of no return for this is the time wherein Kanou would loss his control and simply follow his urges at devouring the boy. Perhaps his only reserve was the fact that he had to be careful with his ministrations for he might seriously damaged the boy.

"Unnnh, Kkkanou-san, yaaaa, mmmmm,"

"Hmmm, what did you say again?" Kanou asked playfully. _This would be the last time that I'll see you as my lover. After this night, we are back to strangers. _"You are way too verbal tonight," licking the boy's ear, he continued to whisper, "perhaps you like this as much as I do."

"Aaaanoo, yyyyaaaa, matte Kkkanou-san, I have to to mmmm, talk to you aaaaaa, dame, what are you doing? Hnnnnnnn....."

"Hmmm you like that don't you?"_ Yes, Ayase, moan for me, scream for me, yes, even just for tonight, learn to love me._

"Kanou-sssssssaaaaaan aaaaaa," _Kanou-san, no stop, this is not happening, I have to talk to him first. I have to clear things up with him. I have to admit my feelings to him. I "_Nooooooooooooooo...."

Kanou felt a stab of pain on his chest. Here he is, being outrightly rejected by his most beloved one. No one ever rejected him before when it comes to sex since he was really good at it. _Ayase please, please just this once, our last night together, don't deny me this._

"Ayase, I'm going to enter you now." He immediately turned his attention towards the bedside drawer, focused on looking for the lube. _Don't look at him, Kanou, don't even dare. _Even as he continued caressing the boy, he never dared looked at the boy's eyes for he was afraid that by doing so, he would see rejection, sadness and hatred for him.

Meanwhile, Ayase was frantically searching his mind of a way to get out of this dilemma. He couldn't stop himself from moaning and from screaming in pleasure every now and then. _Kami-sama, am I so disgusting in his eyes that he wouldn't even consider looking at me? Then why is he doing this to me? Why is he making love with me? Oh please, look at me......_

_Tell me......why are you hiding from me? _

All logical thoughts were shrugged away as Ayase felt his body being ripped open from behind. He was so lost in pain and pleasure at the same time that tears started falling from his eyes. At that moment, he felt so alone, so lost that he couldn't even control his own body.

Nothing......

Nothing mattered anymore, everything is being done out of pleasure and lust. Irrationality overshadowed rationality. Slick bodies moving against each other roughly, sweats intermingling with low groans and high pitched moans, everything is gradually turning out into a mess.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH," and finally Ayase came hard, so hard that his hips contracted for almost twenty seconds. Too tired to move and to face the man above him, he chose to shut down his senses and went to sleep so that he could once again escape from reality. To procrastinate is part of a student's life and that is exactly what he is doing....delaying his confrontation with Kanou.

_I will talk to him tomorrow. _Unbeknownst to him, fate will not grant him a second chance for....

------------------------------------------------------------Tomorrow never comes until it's too late----------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning......

Ayase woke up to the sound of a luggage being zipped up. He tried to stand up but to his horror, his body wouldn't comply. _Oh no, what's happening to me? _He tried to speak but no words came out of his mouth. His throat felt dry and for a second, he thought he was going to die.

Kanou's POV.....

Kanou was in a hurry with the way he shoved his clothes, toilet kits, footwear in a single gigantic luggage without bothering to even segregate them into different compartments. This was the third luggage he packed since yesterday night after his rough session with his soon to be ex-lover. As he was scanning around the room, he noticed that Ayase was already awake and immobile. _Thank god, the drug worked. This is my last chance to confess to him while looking at him straight in the eyes. This is my last chance to stare at his face without getting rejected outrightly. _He then went to the young boy and sat down at the side of the bed. He kissed the other's forehead, nose, cheeks and finally the lips. Trading kisses with caresses, he finally managed to work up the courage to talk. _After all, he couldn't move right? _

"Ayase, forgive me for drugging you yesterday." _Come on, Kanou, go on, you have to do this before you leave._ "I only did it so that you wouldn't reject me once I confessed my whole feelings for you. Don't worry, the drug will soon wear off and then, you will be able to curse me but when that time comes, I will be gone....and I promise not to show myself to you ever again." _I can't believe this, I've practiced this for the last two weeks and never stuttered even once but now, why am I so tense, and so close to tearing up. No, no Kanou, you can do this. He is just a young boy remember? _

"I....I just want to apologize for all the things I've done to you....for for raping you, for forcing you to go to bed with me and most of all, for threatening you and destroying your sense of self. You see, now that I've thought about it, I wanted you to grow and be happy as a person. By being with me, this goal is impossible and for this, I thought it would be best for us to part ways."

Kanou forced himself to turned the other way, not wanting the other to see his tears. After making sure that his face and voice don't betray the fact that he had been crying, he once again turned to look at Ayase in the eyes. This time he stared at them long and hard before finally saying, "I love you so much, Ayase. You were the beginning of my life and for that I owe you your freedom. After this day is over, you are free and you can choose whom you want to be with, and don't worry because I wouldn't be there to cause trouble for you again. So, I guess this is farewell, my dear beloved Ayase." With one last kiss, Kanou left the bed side, gather his belongings and went straight for the door without glancing back.

Gone.....and never ever coming back.....

Ayase's POV.....

_What the....why can't I speak, I...I can't even move. What's wrong with me?_

_Kanou-san, why why are you packing your stuff, please please look at me._

"Ayase, forgive me for drugging you yesterday."

_Why why would you drug me? _

"I only did it so that you wouldn't reject me once I confessed my whole feelings for you. Don't worry, the drug will soon wear off and then, you will be able to curse me but when that time comes, I will be gone....and I promise not to show myself to you ever again."

_What what is he saying? No, no, no, Kanou-san, this is wrong, this is all wrong, I...I.. would never ever reject you. _

"I will be gone....and I promise not to show myself to you ever again."

_I can't....please Kanou-san, don't don't leave me, don't do this to us. I...I'm sorry, damn it, I can't speak, this is terrible. I have to force myself to speak, please Kami-sama, give me my voice even just to utter three words._

_Three words that could save this relationship. Three words that could save us from a broken heart. _

"I....I just want to apologize for all the things I've done to you....for for raping you, for forcing you to go to bed with me and most of all, for threatening you and destroying your sense of self.

_Is this the reason why you're avoiding me? Is that all? No way, I can't allow this to happen. Kanou-san, please please, you could have talked to me about this. Oh my god, Noooooo....._

He wanted so much to cry, to hurl himself towards the older man, to tell this man how much he means to him, to embrace him, to

Love him.....

"I love you so much, Ayase. You were the beginning of my life and for that I owe you your freedom. After this day is over, you are free and you can choose whom you want to be with, and don't worry because I wouldn't be there to cause trouble for you again. So, I guess this is farewell, my dear beloved Ayase."

_Kanou-san, don't go, I love you too and you were also an integral part of my life without you oh god, please somebody, anybody, bring my voice back. Please give me my tears back. I don't want this, Kanou-san._

"So, I guess this is farewell, my dear beloved Ayase."

_Farewell...NO, NO, NO, what do you mean by farewell? Please somebody stop him, don't ....don't GO........please stop this man, let anything happen.....a typhoon, an earthquake, anything that will make him stay here....._

Unfortunately, nothing happened and Kanou was safely out of the door.

Safely leaving him.....

He lost the battle for Kanou was now gone.......never to be seen again.

* * *

A/N: To be honest, I plan to make this chapter longer than this, but I was thinking that too much details might cause boredom:) Homophobic reviews don't stay long in my list of reviews so don't sweat it, homo haters. The rest, please tell me what you think:)


	3. Chapter 3: Your Memory or My Sanity

Summary: Kanou already left Ayase for good which lead to Ayase searching for him. Despite his unfruitful search, he was not about to give up until something made him realize that perhaps his lover is just a figment of his imagination.

Author's note: Wow, Thank God for giving me the time to write yaoi madness. Loads of appreciation for KyuuketsukiNekko, Ralyena Starrling, see1like, Onige-a, PurpleLeopard, wara ningyo, Ebony-Knight, Yaoifangirl89, PixieFrog, 12Ang122, Nicole Narkiss, Scheat, and last but not the least to VannaUsagi13. Thank You also for those who favorited and/or alerted this story. Hope you enjoy it. I just want to apologize for a really slow update.

Warning: Yaoi (boy x boy relationship). If you are not into this kind of genre, please stay away or be influenced by the yaoi goodness.

Disclaimer: I do not own Okane ga nai.

* * *

Chapter 3: Your Memory or My Sanity

"Shachou, the plane's ready."

"Thanks, Misao, please tell the others that we will be leaving shortly and please don't forget....."

Misao immediately knew as to whom his boss was referring to. "Yes Sir, every thing's set, he will be well provided for the rest of his life, basic necessities and all that."

Kanou nodded his head. He already made up his mind and convinced himself more than a million times that his decision of leaving the young boy was for the best.

"KANOU-SAN DON'T GO!"

Ayase woke up from a horrible nightmare. He lifted his hand and gently touched his forehead, wondering as to why it hurt like hell.

As part of his daily routine, he immediately went to the closet that he and his lover shared only to find it.....

Empty.

And that was when it hit him.

"_So, I guess this is farewell, my dear beloved Ayase." _

.........his lover was now gone, never to be seen again by him.

His vision started to get blurry from the tears that were threatening to fall. _There may still be a chance to find him. If he was in his office the last time he disappeared, perhaps that's where he is hiding now. After all, where would he go? _

He tried convincing himself and tried to erase out of his mind one of his lover's statements as he was about to leave him.

"_I will be gone....and I promise not to show myself to you ever again."_

He felt a chill run down his whole being but he shrugged it off. _I better hurry and settle this misunderstanding once and for all. _He then wiped the corners of his eyes and then made a dashed outside the apartment. _Kanou-san, please wait for me. _

In the office......

"Please please, I need to see him. Tell him it's urgent!"

"I'm sorry, Sir but I honestly don't know who are you talking about."

"Kanou Somuku, the owner of this company, your boss, his office is on the top floor!" Ayase was starting to get exasperated and more than once did he consider to just drop all formalities and went straight to his lover's workstation. After all, this was not the first time that he had cause a such a ruckus.

"Tell him that I need to tell him something and I promise that I wouldn't disturb him once I'm done." _Once he hears me out, I'm sure he'll come home with me and then perhaps....._

He blushed at the idea of making love with his huge lover. Never before did he anticipate to have sex with Kanou since he always gets it every time. Now, the loss of intimacy left him craving for more, making him realize how he had taken his lover for granted.

_I'm such a selfish jerk. All these time, he's just thinking about me, only my well-being and not even himself._

"Sir, I'm really sorry, but there's no Kanou Somuku who works here. I already checked the records of the different employees here from rank and file to the executives and none reflect the name that you are looking for."

And of course, Ayase didn't believe it. "What about Homare Kuba or Misao Kuba, can I at least talk with them?" If his lover really wasn't there, at least he could be granted entrance with the fact that he is associated with the Kuba brothers.

"Sir, there are also no employees that goes by the name of the people you just mentioned," the poor lady was starting to panic as Ayase tried his best to keep his cool.

As if on cue, he made a dash towards the elevator and as the doors were about to open, a huge man wearing a black suit grab him on the shoulders.

"Mr. Ayase Yukiya, if I'm not mistaken?" With the way he pronounced the boy's name, he was more than sure of what he's claiming and the asking part was only out of courtesy.

"Yyes." _This man is almost as huge as Kanou-san._ A while back then, he almost mistook this guy for his lover only to be disappointed as he saw the difference in the facial features.

"May I know the reason as to why you're so eager to barge into my office?" His voice suddenly sounded menacing.

"Uhm, I was wondering if I could speak to your president Mr. Kanou Somuku." He could feel himself stuttering out of fear at the man in front of him.

"As was stated to you a while ago, there is no one here that goes by that name and if you are looking for the president then you are looking for me."

"Bbut, that can't be Sir, Mr. Kanou Somuku is the owner of this company." _What's wrong with this place? I couldn't possibly entered the wrong building or did I? But the interior and the architecture of this place looks the same as my previous visits._

"Mr. Ayase Yukiya, pardon me for saying this, but as of the moment, I will ask you to politely leave the premises before I call security. The people you are looking for doesn't exist or at least they are not under my payroll, now if you'll excuse me."

"Matte, WAIT, Sir, how do you know my name?"_ Perhaps this is one of Kanou-san's tricks of making me stay away from him. _

"Hmmph, you used to be a merchandise in the black market, am I correct?"

Ayase just wanted to hide his face in shame.

"Look I don't know and I am not interested as to how you manage to get out of there unscathed but let me tell you one thing, it would be wise of you to remain where you are without questions."

"WAIT, DID KANOU-SAN PAID YOU TO SAY ALL OF THIS TO ME? PLEASE ANSWER ME! DID HE?"

"I honestly don't know what you're talking about. One more word from you and I would call someone from the mental institute."

"No, that can't be possible, just yesterday, I've been here and I swear that Kanou and the others work here. Sir, please if you wouldn't mind, I would like to take a look around the complex."

The man just gave him a blank stare. "If that's what it takes to make you shut the hell up, might as well grant you your request but on one condition."

"Uhm, on what condition if I may ask?"

"This would be the last time you will enter my building. There will be no next times or else, there will be dire consequences."

Ayase had no time to be threatened by such a threat. He was just relieved that he will get to see his lover. _And then, make a confession to Kanou-san...._

He was confident that he will get to see Kanou once he tours the vicinity. _After all, if there's one place that Kanou-san can never ever leave, it's his office._

Or so he thought.......

"Thank you so much," he then immediately went inside the elevator that would bring him up to where his lover is.

* * *

**Meanwhile.....**

As the elevator's steel doors closed, a resounding ring tone made itself known to the entire occupants in the lobby.

Everyone paused and held their breaths as the phone was being picked up by its owner.

"Hello."

"Misao, I've heard what you've told him, you've done a good job. Now I must leave before he reaches my office. See you later."

"Thank you, shachou. Personally, I can't believe that my disguise worked that well."

"I know. By the way, I'm making you in charge of everyone else. Make sure that they all do their part until he finally believes that he's......"

_Delusional? _Misao mentally finished.

"I just want him to forget all about me and everything in association with me." For a second, his voice turned solemn before reverting back to being authoritarian, "I entrusted you with the job and I trust that you wouldn't dare do something that would mess this whole thing up, understood?"

"Yes Sir, just one question though, how would he possibly believe that we are not real if he is still residing in your apartment and paying for his necessities?"

There was a long pause.

"Misao Kuba, this is exactly the reason why I only assigned the task to you."

The line then went dead leaving Misao still clutching the phone on his right ear. _Am I dreaming? or did just the shachou gave me freedom to do what I am capable of? The things that I can't possibly do when Homare's around._ If there is one big difference between his brother and him is his ruthlessness when it comes to these things.

Ayase's POV

_This can't be happening......_

_How come I can't find anyone related to him? Homare, Misao, even his brother's missing. I know for sure that that building is his office. What's wrong? It's as if everybody left with him._

_NO NO NO, AYASE THAT'S not possible.....He wouldn't do that. Besides, everyone he knows has lives of their own which means that not everyone's lives revolves around him._

_But he's part of the mafia. Is he keeping everyone else from me? Why?_

_Wait calm down, I shouldn't be panicking. Maybe I'm just stressed. Maybe I should go back to the apartment and rest for a while. It can't possibly turn out that Kanou-san and the others are not real._

_That's absurd....I've been living under his care for the past two years_

_.................those times can't possibly be just be a product of my imagination._

_

* * *

_**Three months has passed **and still..........**NOTHING**

Every single person that Ayase asked about Kanou either say that they never met him before or they might have seen him somewhere and that they just don't remember.

Still....Ayase never gave up hope.

It was the thirteenth weekend since the disappearance of his lover. Every break, spare time he has, were spent on searching for Kanou. He consulted the authorities, local establishments, and everything that seems to have some connection with his lover.

The result of his search is always nothing.

It was starting to get late and Ayase once again finds himself at a loss with regards to his feelings. Everything about this place is suffocating him. He used to admire the night life in this city from his window at the apartment he and Kanou shared. His lover wouldn't let him come out of night and he remembered how much he hated to be confined. But now.....

_I would rather not be free as I am right now than be separated from you...._

He could feel his hands shaking and before he knew it, he was already sobbing as he remembers Kanou's words.

_Is this what he means by setting me free?_

"Uhm, Mister? Hello? You know you should be going home right now."

Ayase immediately rubbed his eyes, trying his best not to show the stranger that he was crying.

"Hmm, let me guess, your lover left you?"

No answer.....

"Guess, I'm right. You know it may seem impossible at first but you will forget about that person sooner than you thought. After a bad breakup, everyone thinks that they can't live without that person, but that's not true. BWAHAHAHAHA, look at me. I'm happier than a mad man!"

Ayase noticed that the man was drunk.

"Kid, you know what I did? I killed my wife's boyfriend and then I stabbed her."

Not only that, the man's also a lunatic. _I better get out of here....this man's crazy...._

"Ano, sumimasen, but I think I have to go home right now." _Don't tremble, don't let him know that you are afraid. _

"Hhey, so sssssoooon? Come on, let's have a drink."

As much as Ayase loves drinking, he didn't find the appetite to do so right now.

"Uhm, thanks, but I have to go." Without waiting for a reply, he scrambled on his right, running as fast as he could.

"Hey, YOUNG FELLA, WHERE ARE YOU GOING? HAHAHA, DID I SCARE YOU? MAYBE I SHOULD STOP WITH THE JOKES. TO TELL THE TRUTH, I DON'T HAVE A WIFE, I JUST IMAGINED I HAVE ONE."

Ayase was too busy running that he didn't have time to digest the man's words.

Once he reached his apartment, he flopped down on his bed and covered his eyes with his left arm. Too exhausted from all the stress he'd been experiencing since starting the search for his missing lover.

_How long could I hold on? _

He forced himself to get up and do his usual routine. Eat, bath, clean the house, study and sleep. Everything that he has been doing now seems to be all routinized and forced. All he wanted was to keep on looking for Kanou until he finds him and then, he wouldn't chickened out like he used to.

After having his dinner and bath, he looked at the house, figuring out which parts are in need of his cleaning expertise. He started cleaning the dishes first, then after placing them in the dishwasher, he proceeded in sweeping the floor, starting from the dining room all the way to the bedroom.

It was only during cleaning time wherein he feels at ease and the only moment wherein his mind's not preoccupied by thoughts of his lover. Just as he was about to leave the doorway, he noticed something squeezed at the door's threshold. Something he had missed on his way inside the apartment.

_A letter from the postman this late in the evening?_

He was about to leave it and save it for tomorrow when something nagged at the back of his head that had him changed his mind.

_Maybe it's from Kanou-san. _Excitedly, he ran straight to the door, picked up the plain white envelope and sat down at the nearest chair he could could feel his heart throbbing and he was shaking from happiness.

_Is this it? Is he coming home? _

He meticulously opened the envelope, carefully not wrinkling the sides and making sure not to tear the flap as he was removing the seal.

Dear Ayase,

I am so happy that you are doing great in your new apartment. I can't wait to see you this weekend. We need to catch on a lot of things. How's school? I've heard that you are doing well. Ja, see you this weekend.

P.S. How's your new apartment? If you don't like it there, I'm sure we can choose a new one. Don't worry, all expenses will still be charge on us as usual. 

Love,

Mommy and Daddy

Ayase stared blankly at the paper in his hands. He was now more confused than ever.

_What is this? Is this some kind of joke? I still have a Mother and Father? The last time I check, I don't have parents anymore._

He read the letter over and over again, trying to make sense of every word but to no avail. The more he analyzed, the more questions entered his thoughts.

_What about the apartment? This letter seems to be stating that this apartment is mine. _

After staring at it for a few more minutes, he came to the conclusion that the letter must have been sent to the wrong person--somebody who has the same name as him. He looked at the back of the envelope and saw that it was the address of his apartment.

Sighing, he decided not to trouble himself over something like this. He still have school tomorrow and he cannot afford to miss another day. He was absent for one whole week just right after Kanou's disappearance. He was only given a chance by the school because of his good records.

Turning off the lights, he went to bed, hoping to fall asleep and forget tonight's events. The crazy man and the prank letter.....

As he was just about to doze off, there were bizarre images that presented themselves to him. He saw himself back to where the crazy man he met a few hours ago and then the prank letter.

And all of a sudden, it made sense....an epiphanic moment...one that he wasn't happy about.

He bolted upright from his bed. All traces of sleepiness were long gone and he was left with a very disturbing thought.

"_To tell the truth, I don't have a wife, I just imagined I had one."_

He could hear the man's words from a while ago and then remembered the message of the letter.

"_P.S. How's your new apartment? If you don't like it there, I'm sure we can choose a new one. Don't worry, all expenses will still be charge on us as usual."_

_Oh no, am I seeing things? Does this mean that that......_

_........Kanou-san's not real? NO THAT CAN'T BE.....He is the one who's paying for all my expenses. The apartment, my schooling EVERYTHING!_

"_Don't worry, all expenses will still be charge on us as usual."_

_That's not true. "_NO NO THAT CAN'T BE, KANOU-SAN'S REAL. I AM NOT IMAGINING THINGS. I AM NOT!"

"_Sir, there is no one here that goes by that name."_

_NO, Kanou-san's real, if he's not then Someya, Gion, Homare and Misao must be real right?_

_But you haven't seen any of them since he left, right?_ A voice at the back of his mind was taunting him like a snake waiting for him to fall to its trap.

Ayase was paralyzed. He could no longer argue. The facts are all there. Everyone he knew, the life he lived, the past two years were a joke.

He couldn't move, his senses were shut down, except from the splitting headache that made him scream to no end.

* * *

**Meanwhile.....outside his apartment**

"Sir, phase one of the plan has been executed."

"Good, keep up the good work, Misao."

* * *

**The next morning....**

Ayase couldn't get up from bed nor did he wanted to. _Oh no, now I'm going to cut another class because I'm not feeling well again. I just had the worst nightmare ever. I can't believe my subconscious is telling me that Kanou-san is not real._

At just the thought of his lover, he could feel the adrenaline rush pumping into his system and therefore was able to get out of bed. _A simple body pain is nothing as compared to a day wasted not looking for Kanou-san. _He tried convincing himself that as long as he doesn't stop looking, he will surely find him.

He went to the bathroom first, prepared himself for school and went down for breakfast. As he was just about to eat his meal, he saw the letter from yesterday night and then there was a loud crashing sound.....

It took him a moment to realize that he had dropped his plate but that was the least of his concern. _No, no, no......_

The events from yesterday night hit him like a tidal wave and he could feel himself suffocating. _Is this for real? Am I really delusional?_

He didn't want to believe it. He immediately took the envelope and tear it before throwing the pieces out of the window.

_Someone's definitely playing a prank on me. I have to stay focus. I have to. I cannot afford to lose sight of what I'm looking for._

With that mindset, he set off for school hoping once again like the days before that he would bumped into his lover. He would then tell him how he really felt about their relationship. Never mind the place or the time....._as long as I get to tell him._

The day was finally over. School's done and Ayase finds himself wandering around the streets of Tokyo, checking each and everything he passes by, anyone that somehow resembles his lover immediately catches his attention. Sometimes, he even resorted to stalking different people, only to be disappointed once he was sure that none of them was his lover.

Dejected, he went home with a broken heart. He doesn't want to think of anything as of the present. He tried shutting down his thoughts but to no avail. He can't help but reminisce the night his lover drugged and left him.

.........the memory never failed to bring tears to his eyes.

As his usual routine, he used the stairs in going to his apartment. While he was fishing for his keys, he noticed that there was a light emanating just above the main door's threshold. He halted his movement. _Could it be?_

Without even thinking, he made a dash towards the door, turned the doorknob to the right, hoping to finally see the huge man whom he missed so much. _He came back! He came back!_

"AYASE, oh how's my little boy? Did you miss me?"

Needless to say, the said boy was rendered speechless.

"I know it's been so long since we've last seen each other. Come to Mommy!"

Before the woman had the chance to reach him, Ayase was gone in a flash.

------running as fast as he could away from that place, never wanting to come back.

Something tells him that staying away from that place is the best option in keeping himself sane.

"WHAT? YOU LOST HIM? MISAO KUBA, HOW COULD YOU LOST TRACK OF HIM? I CONSIDERED YOU TO BE MUCH MORE RESOURCEFUL THAN THAT!"

Misao Kuba tried his best to answer his boss over the phone but truth to be told, he was already shaking to the very core. The moment he realized that he lost track of Ayase, he was more than ready for his death.

"Sir, I apologize, I truly am sorry and I am ready to face the consequences."

"DAMN RIGHT! GET YOURSELF HERE THIS INSTANCE AND I ASSURE YOU THAT YOU'RE GOING TO DIE A MILLION DEATHS!"

"Understood, Sir."

Several weeks had passed and never once did Ayase went back to his apartment nor did he plan to do so. He already stopped going to school and is currently residing in one of the cheapest apartments in the outskirts of Shinjuku. Ever since he left the apartment, he has to start earning his own money since the money stopped coming in. He found a job in one of the sushi houses near his apartment as an assistant to the head chef.

The weeks before had been a disaster for him. He spent most of his days wallowing in self-loathing. He hated himself for being pitiful, for always being at the bottom and worst, for trying to create a person that would love and protect him unconditionally. _Maybe it's all because of my weak personality that I started conjuring up all these great people around me when in reality, they are not real after all. Kanou, Gion, Kuba, Someya. They're all so great, how can I actually believe that they are all real. Great people like them are simply too good to be true_

_But what about the extravagant life you've lived for the past two years?_

He chose to ignore that logical voice of his mind right now. It only made him more confused. _ I have to start making a living of my own before I go crazy. And once I've earned enough, I'm going to go back to school as a normal student. Yes, that's right, I am a normal average student......Kanou, and the others aren't real. I lived on my own. Perhaps, the reason why I started having illusions was because I was lonely on my own. I imagined that someone would want and accept me for who I am._

And right then, he decided to stop looking for Kanou.

_I have to start living my own life. I should start focusing on my goals and stop believing what I want to believe. All I know is that I don't have anyone in my life. My parents are long dead and that letter is a prank. I am a freshman student, making a living on my own and not dependent on some rich loan shark. How can someone as young as Kanou-san own a financial firm, that's impossible and totally unrealistic. It's only a matter of time that I stop misleading myself. _

**A**nd so, that was how he lived his life for the next few years. He worked full time for a year and started reapplying for college. Initially, he planned on saving enough money that could last him for his whole college life and then start saving up again but sad to say, jobs that pay high require at least a college degree therefore, he decided to become a working student.

When he finally made it to his final year in college, he was already twenty-three years old. His features changed even just a bit. His chest become toner but the it never lost its feminine smoothness, his hair tied into a ponytail, and he grew slightly taller although his eyes lost its teary luster. There were circles under his eyes due to lack of sleep from working too much. Currently, he is having troubles paying for his tuition. He already exhausted all of his resources and spent his entire summer earnings just to pay for the last semester's tuition fee. _I can't possibly stop schooling now, I've come so far and I can't afford to give up now. _

He had to think of something and fast. School's opening in the next two months and he found himself with no money at all. He only ate once a day and didn't use much electricity. He already tried asking money from the bank and other reputable lending agencies but to no avail. They simply rejected his application after seeing his records. Out of courtesy, they just told him that he does not qualify and they might reconsider. But Ayase knew better and it was about time that he started looking for another way of acquiring money. Anything that could make him finish college.

* * *

**At the same time......**

Misao is now currently working in an recruitment agency. He finds his job interesting but not as exciting as the one he had before. The pay is not as high as compared to his previous job but it is enough to pay for his expenses and even saved a little for himself. Despite having friendly colleagues, he is feeling lonely for he haven't seen his twin brother for the past few years.

**Flashback**

"Kanou-shachou, I'm sorry for I have failed with my mission."

His boss stared at him with so much anger and disappointment. silently telling him how he could have failed such a simple mission of guarding Ayase. "If you think that coming here means your death, then you are correct, but after some reconsideration, I decided to just let you off your job."

Misao couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Sir, I beg your pardon?"

"You are to resign from your post and never to show your face here again. Now if you'll please excuse me, I have other things to attend to."

"Sir, please don't include my brother into this."

"Don't sweat it, I didn't fire your brother and I wouldn't involve him any further with your life."

**End of Flashback**

At that time, he never understood the full meaning behind those words, all he knows was that that day was his lucky day. Kanou didn't kill him or made him suffer, he simply fired him and didn't include his twin brother in the picture. But his luck was only short lived for he never saw his brother right after that day. He was ready to die that day but he never thought that he would be separated from his brother. He knew that Homare had done something to stop their shachou from taking away his life. Homare is just that kind of person. _Unlike me....._

He sighed dejectedly for he missed his brother so much. If Homare were in his position, he wouldn't have done anything to stop their boss from punishing his twin. But on the second thought, Homare wouldn't agree to deceive Ayase like he did back then.

"Hey, Misao, here are more applications for you to check on, I'm sorry if this is a lot, don't worry, your soon to be assistant will be arriving next week, so hang on there."

"Yes Boss, don't worry I'm used to have this plenty of work."

"That's what I like about you, don't worry, I will try to increase your pay, as you know, I still have to check our agency's profits if I can afford a salary raise."

"Don't sweat it, Boss."

"Okay now, let's go back to work."

Misao stared at the pile of application forms that were piled at the chair beside him. His desk was already full from yesterday's application forms. Hopefully, he will be done screening all of them at the end of the day or else, he might just take home some of them. He started arranging them according to the positions applied and then the age requirements. After that, he started reading and browsing through them.

He then began rejecting some of them, mostly because the applicant is just too young to be working. His boss was strict when it comes to these issues, they wouldn't have their name tainted just because they recruited some kid and sent them to their employers without as much as a permit. _Seriously, is life nowadays that hard that kids have to start working to support themselves? _

Just as he was about to browse through the fortieth application, he noticed that he made a mistake in the arrangement. Apparently, he misplaced the application of a twenty-three year old boy among the underage ones. _It can't be help since this kid looks really young for his age. SHOOOT!_

APPLICANT NAME: Y.U.K.I.Y.A A.Y.A.S.E

_How can I possibly miss that? _He could feel his hands shaking and if possible, his entire being. A lot of things are running in circles across his mind and he couldn't formulate a logical conclusion as to what to do with the application. _Well for one, he is not underage and he is obviously eligible for working. _He looked down at the position applied and saw that it was vacant. _What the.....it only says that he is available for any kind of job a.s.a.p and is need of a high salary. _

And that was when it hit him.

He scribbled down on the application form and stamped it for approval from his superior. He just hoped that his ex-boss was still living there. _Even though, the shachou doesn't need any maid as of the moment, he couldn't possibly reject this one. _

After all, he still has a lot of connection from the people who are working for his former boss. He wasn't Kanou's confidante for nothing. Most of the employees there at least owe him something especially, whenever problems arise. They would usually ask for his help especially when it comes to finishing their job or when they would request for an extension from their tyrannic boss.

_Perhaps, I still have a chance on redeeming myself to him and apologize to Ayase. Hopefully, I will get to see Homare then. _

_

* * *

_

Ayase couldn't believe his eyes as he stared down at the acceptance letter that was just delivered by the post man. Among all the applications he submitted, he never thought that this one would come back. The place may be a little bit far from his house and school but the salary that he will be getting will be enough to pay for his tuition fee. _Kami-sama, OH GOD, THANK YOU THANK YOU!_

He couldn't believe his luck to the point that he had to rub his eyes just to make sure that he wasn't dreaming. He immediately searched for the number and dialed it so as to confirm that he accepted the job offer.

* * *

A/N: Reviews are cherished, loved and well-taken care of. Unless you have nothing to do and would like to start a ruckus by supplying homophobic comments. Amen. Oh by the way, I'm planning to add another couple in this story aside from Kanou and Ayase, but I'll see based on the reviews, if the second couple is evident in this chapter:)


	4. Chapter 4: Living For the First Time

Summary: Ayase has finally moved on with his life. But just as he thought that life was finally turning into his favor, he was met by someone from his past whom he thought was already out of his life.

Author's note: Let's give it up for usamilover, PurpleLeopard, satsuki0tamaki, Yaoifangirl89, Belward4ever, Ralyena Starrling, animeannie, seraphim, smartpuppy, okanie, Hyperwiwi, Wildfury, Takaba Akihito, and last but not the least, A Goddess Under The Cupboard. Thank You also for those who favorited and/or alerted this story. Hope you enjoy it. I just want to apologize for a really slow update.

Warning: Yaoi (boy x boy relationship). That's enough said...

Disclaimer: I do not own Okane ga nai.

* * *

Chapter 4: Living for the First Time

Ayase definitely had no idea what he got himself into. All he knows is that he will be receiving enough money for college as some big shot's servant.

He was not even the least devastated after realizing what kind of job he got himself into. _I can't believe this, it's like they say, all things fall into place within the right time. I can't believe my luck. No, that's not it, I've worked so hard for me to finally reach this point of my life. Now that I'm in my last year of college, I can't back out now. Whatever the cost, I will do anything to achieve my goals._

His thoughts were cut off by a sudden phone call.

"Moshi, moshi,"

"Hello, may I speak to Mr. Yukiya Ayase?"

"Speaking..."

"This is ... from the recruitment agency, I just want you to know that you can start working for your new employer as soon as tomorrow. Will that be okay with you?"

Without even thinking, Ayase immediately said, "YES! Uhm, may I know where is the place?"

"Oh about that, I can arrange for someone to pick you up then you wouldn't have to go through all the trouble of finding the place."

"Rrreally? Thank you, Thank you, Sir!" _Oh please, please, let this be real!_

"Oh one more thing, we have to change your name since uhm, there's a lot of Ayase working in that place and they might confuse you with someone else. Do you have any preferred names whatsoever?"

"Ano, it depends on what you think is most fitting, Sir."

"Okay then, bye."

"Sure."

* * *

Meanwhile...

"Ahem," Misao Kuba coughed. _At least, he didn't recognize my voice. Either I'm so good at pretending or he just totally believed that we don't exist in his life. _

He carefully placed Ayase's application form on top of the others. He even made an effort to produce a lot of copies just to make sure he won't lose Ayase's records.

_I just hope everything goes according to plan...and perhaps, I could finally see my brother once more._

_

* * *

_The following day...

Ayase wanted to hit himself for doing something stupid. _How can I actually forget to ask for his name? What if the caller was a prank and no one showed up today? Or what if he's not really from the agency?_

Knock...knock...

"Coming!" He quickly opened his door to reveal two brawl men with one of them holding a piece of paper, "I believe you are Yukiya Ayase, please sign your name below. The agency mentioned that your name will be changed to Hikaru Kohaku."

"May I ask why?"

"Some form of rules...I don't know, and don't even bother asking me about it? So, you signing or not?"

He didn't even bothered reading the terms and conditions that were stated on the sheet of paper, he just kept on signing as if his life depended on it. _Well, if you think about it, my future depends on this job. _

"Thank you, Miss," one of the guys winked.

"Hey, I'm not a girl."

"Oh oh is that right? Sorry, by the way, we came here to pick you up. May we come in?"

Ayase nodded but shuddered at the lecherous grin directed to him by the other man.

"Okay, is this all your luggage, Sir?"

"Uhm, yes, thank you," _I just hoped everything goes well._

When they finally reached the place after traveling for about three hours, Ayase had to bit his lips to prevent himself from gawking at the place. _This place's huge!_

There were massive rows of flowers that adorned the front yard with several gardeners tending to them. He thought for a second that they were about to come to a stop until they came across the rose bushes. At this point, he couldn't suppressed a "wow" or "oh" coming from his lips as the said bushes let them in. It turns out it was another gate, only covered with roses. _So this is how rich people live, not only do they have to hide from the world, they also have to hide their living quarters as well._

The garden inside is even more of an eye catcher than the one outside. It's as if some paradise fell and decided to settle here. _This is unbelievable! Is it really possible that only one person owns this place? He must have a huge family and lots of visitors for him to be needing this much space! Plus, the fact that we've been going around the vicinity for almost quarter of an hour, I can't wait to see what the house looks like._

As if on cue, a mansion came into view lit by several halogen lights with several trees cueing up within its borders, except for the middle portion that serves as an entry point.

"Mr. Kohaku, we've already reached our destination, please avoid running off on your own or else, you might not find your way back. You do not want to be a menace to your new employer before your work even begins," commanded by one of the brawl men.

"Oh, okay," he then went down the vehicle and proceeded to get his luggage from the trunk. "Uhm, ano which way should I head to?"

"Sorry, my apologies for forgetting to tell you, this is where the menservants reside while they are employed here. This is to ensure that they will always be ready whenever the master or any of his family or guests are in need of assistance."

"Yyou mean to say...that this entire manor is only for the menservants?"

"Yes, the maidservants on the other hand, lived in a separate compound. I know you are astonished at how big this place is, but save your energy, for tomorrow, you will get to see the master's mansion and believe me, this place is nothing in comparison with his living quarters. Now if you please, follow me and I'll show you your room."

"Hhai, arigatou gozaimasu, thank you." _Oh god, I just can't believe my luck. I even have my own room which is way larger than my previous apartment._

_

* * *

_The next morning...

"Mr. Hikaru Kohaku, Mr. Satoo Hiroshi, and Mr. Suzuki Ichiroo, please assemble downstairs within five minutes," the head servant announced via megaphone.

However, there was no need for Ayase to be rendered awake, he was already up more than an hour ago and is all set for the day ahead. He was only waiting for the cue for him to start his first day at work.

* * *

Kanou was starting to feel annoyed at the pile of papers situated on his desk. _Kami-sama, not only do I have to attend gatherings day in and day out but I also have to do the stupid paperwork before the so-called big day._

Before he could dwell deeper into his own musings, a silent knock on his door prevented him from doing so.

"Shachou, please don't forget that you have a fitting in a while."

He replied with a loud groan, wanting more than anything for the person outside his door to just leave him alone. _I really wish for this day to be over...and if possible, the following days after._

Life was starting to be meaningless at least for him. Despite his firm's growth over the last few years, he never felt satisfied, but instead felt even more empty inside.

That was why when his financial partners demanded that he immediately find a suitable maid to be her wife, he never even bothered to protest. All he knew was that the marriage was supposedly for the benefit of his firm. And by benefit, he meant profit at its maximum.

Akane Etsuko, the only daughter of Daichi Etsuko , the biggest insurance company in terms of assets and profits in the past few years. _Not bad, not bad at all..._

Just this morning, insurance tycoon, initiated a conference with him over the phone. It didn't take much convincing for the old man to agree with the marriage, especially after he had summarized to him his firm's earnings and not to mention, the money that both of their companies' will be getting after such a merging happened.

As he recalled the conversation, he can't help but grin. _I can't believe things are turning out in my favor._

_

* * *

_Meanwhile...

"OKAY, THE THREE OF YOU, LISTEN UP!"

As if on cue, the three boys were already queued up in front of him.

"Before I begin, I would like to introduce myself first, my name is Goro Hideki, but you can call me Mr. Bon."

"This will be your first job so listen carefully. Tonight, our boss' wife to be will be visiting us and I want to make sure that you all look your best. Your outfits were already delivered into your respective rooms. And your main job for tonight is to simply greet the madam with her escorts once they entered the mansion. Make sure to keep them entertained until the madam reaches her room which is at the fifth floor. After escorting them there, ask politely if they still need anything, if none, bow down properly and leave the area quietly and as quickly as possible. Are there any questions?"

No answer...

"So we are all set then, please go back to your rooms and change into your formal attires. Within half an hour, I expect you guys to be prepared for I will personally train you guys the proper way to greet the mistress and her cohorts."

* * *

That night...

The hallway was blinding. Chandeliers and halogens illuminate every corner, making the entire place shimmer with a yellowish glow. Guests of varying origin were chatting animatedly with each other, as they wait for the host to present himself. Most of them were essentially major players in the financial sector and as experienced business people, they would not want to disappoint one of the most influential bachelor within the industry. Their main purpose for the evening was to make themselves memorable to the Shinjuku tycoon, hoping that a future partnership will be forged.

Ayase, already dressed up in his white suit was too excited for the sophisticated decor of the entire mansion for this was the first time that he actually worked and lived at such a luxurious residence. _Wow, I can't believe that there are people in this world who could afford to spend so much for an engagement party. I can't wait to see the owner of this house! _

"Hikaru-kun," Mr Bon called to him, almost out of breath, "please please go to the third floor of the mansion, and turned right on the first hallway, here get the key, and hurry!"

"Uhm, pardon?"

"Please just go and give this to the maidservants there, the escort who was holding the key to her room lost it somewhere and she's almost here! Once you are there, just stay with the maidservants, no one's allowed to pass by the staircases once the madam arrives."

"Ookay,"

"NOW GO!"

"Sir, what about attending to the guests?"

"Never mind that, I will take care of that, please go before I scream."

"YES, SIR." With that Ayase left a very pissed off Mr. Bon, and proceeded to do what was asked of him.

It took him less than a minute to reach the madam's room, making the maidservants waiting there, sigh in relief. One of them, a tall and stout middle-aged woman approached and flashed him a warm smile. "Thank you so much, young man. Please stay here with us and avoid going off on your own, the madam's coming and every one of us is expected to be on our respective places and not wander off on our own."

"Ohh, sure, ma'am, it's a pleasure working with all of you."

She smiled at his reply before adding, "The girls call me "mama", please don't hesitate to do the same. By the way, try not to make yourself conspicuous, since it is forbidden to have a guy escort the madam throughout the entire evening."

"Okay, sure, I will try my best!"

"Now, position yourself in the middle of these three pretty maidservants, this is Clarice, Dionise and Micah, I know this is all so sudden, but try to get along with each other."

"Mama, the madam's here," Clarice almost screamed as she announced this.

"Oh mama, she's so pretty, so this is the person whom the master is getting married to. Mama, have you ever seen the master before?" Micah exclaimed.

"Hush there young ladies, I know we are all excited for the night but you have to compose yourselves. With regards to your question, "Yes", I've seen the master before and, yes, he is a very handsome young man. Now, go to your respective places. We don't want to lose face in front of the madam."

"HAI!"

Everyone of them went back to their respective positions, behaving the best they can as the madam was about to pass them.

* * *

Several hours later...

The party was about to come to an end. Ms. Akane was impressed with the man he was bound to marry. Tall, dark, good-looking, smart and most of all-very charismatic. She even wondered why a man like Kanou-san, hasn't yet settled down.

They didn't spoke to each other much. After all, this entire event was meant to entertain their guests or business partners, not to enjoy themselves in each other's company.

As she was climbing the stairs, she can't helped but notice a blonde young girl passed her by. Without even thinking, she halted the young girl's movement. "Hey, you sure have a beautiful pair of eyes, may I know your name, young lady?"

* * *

Ayase was glad that he was done cleaning the madam's room before she came in. _Now I can go downstairs to help the others patch things up and finally get a good night's sleep._

He made his way towards the door and proceeded to go down when he was halted by the madam.

"Hey, you sure have a beautiful pair of eyes, may I know your name, young lady?"

"Uhm, Hikaru Kohaku, madam," he bowed his head, hoping that the girl won't ask him any more questions.

"I really like you, young girl, is it okay if I make you one of my personal maids?"

_Oh no, do I tell the truth that I am a guy or do I risk getting mama and the others fired?_

"Yes madam, no problem."

"Good, now please be at my room by 9 am tomorrow, I would like you to tour me around the place and no offense, please change your attire into something more appropriate for a girl."

"Sure." _Great, now I am in hot water after just a few days at work._

"Good night, Ms. Hikaru."

* * *

The next day...

"Oh my, you're one lucky guy, Hikaru-san, I can't believe that you are working with us," Clarice was practically screaming with delight at having been chosen as one of the madam's personal maidservants as well.

"Clarice-san, it's only 5 in the morning, aren't we suppose to report at 9 am?" Ayase was trying his best to rub the sleep off his eyes.

"Silly Hikaru, of course I know that, that's why I'm waking you up. Mama said that we have to get you prepared for your big day, especially now that you have to learn how to act like a lady. Plus, you will start wearing heels starting from now and that would require lots of practice."

Ayase groaned.

* * *

"Madam, we've already arrived at the West Garden. Please watch your step."

"Hmm...I hate to admit defeat but this place is like ten times bigger than my father's house. The garden alone is enough indication at the vast wealth that your master owns."

"Thank you, madam."

"Hikaru-kun, what do you think of these tulips here?"

"I think they're beautiful."

"Is that so? Well, please make sure that these beautiful flowers are already at my room before I return."

"Yes, madam." Ayase proceeded to the gardener and requested to have a bundle of tulips. As he was making his way back to the mansion, he can't help but look up and stare in awe at the architecture of the whole place. His eyes can't help but wander on their own...observing the intricate designs that adore the walls, the colors that blend perfectly with each other. His eyes then landed on the upper window near the East Garden, and noticed that this one's design is quite different from the others for it has a much simpler design as compared to the rest; it is simply whitewashed and not as impressive as compared with its neighboring windows.

Just then, his confused gaze turned into a stunned one as he was met with a pair of coal eyes.

* * *

Kanou was pacing back and forth inside his study room, trying his best to decide on whether to attend the conference in San Fo or miss his engagement party, not because of the fact that he was excited about it, but he might risk irking some of his long time financial partners if he decided not to show up. By simply saying that he has some business to attend to would only make matters worse; they'd think that they are not worth his time and this may cause him big time losses. On the other hand, if he decided not to attend the conference, he will lose some major projects thus making his rivals ahead of him and that could also incur future losses for his company. _Sheesh, I really want to behead someone right now, but that doesn't solve anything damn it! Might as well, try to relax and dissociate myself from work at the moment._

He made his way towards the corner of the room facing the East Garden. Brushing the curtains to the side, he was immediately greeted with a fresh scenery of the blue sky, well trimmed cut grasses and the various rows of pristine different types of flowers. _Ahh, this place never ceases to amaze me, ever since I transfered here four years ago. _He then imagined a certain blond boy with a pair of cerulean eyes, waving at him from below. This thought alone made him smile. Until now, he still hasn't gotten over his ex-lover yet and with the way things are going, it might take him a while to do so.

As his eyes were busy wandering over the vast landscape presented before him, his gaze was accidentally connected to a warm pair of cerulean eyes.

_What the..._

_

* * *

_"HIKARU! WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? YOU SHOULD BE SETTING UP THOSE TULIPS BY NOW BEFORE THE MADAM COMES BACK!"

"Oh sorry, Ms. Dionise, I'm on my way now." He stole one more glance at the window just to make sure that his eyes weren't playing tricks on him. _I must have been mistaken for there is no man up there. _Feeling his heartbeat return to its normal rate, he carefully handled the bundle of tulips and went inside towards the madam's chamber.

_How stupid of me...how can someone not real be living here?_

_

* * *

_Kanou Somuku was wiping his forehead despite the lack of sweat present there. He could feel himself getting cold feet at what he saw earlier. All his dealings were forgotten as of the moment as he started to rationalize.

_That is not definitely him. That is definitely not him. _

_But those soft yellow locks...long and..._

_No...no...no...that person is a girl...that person is not a man...that person's wearing a dress for Pete's sake. _

_But you've seen him wear a dress before...and he looks absolutely gorgeous in it..._

_STOP! _

"HOMARE! COME INTO MY STUDY ROOM THIS INSTANCE!"

"Sir?"

"I WANT YOU TO LOOK AT THE RECORDS OF ALL OUR EMPLOYEES INSIDE THE MANSION AND TELL ME IF ANYONE, EVEN JUST A TAD BIT, RESEMBLES AYASE!"

"Wwhat? But shachou, isn't Ayase far from here?"

"THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WANT TO KNOW. CAN YOU CALL THAT STUPID WILSON FOR ME?"

"Yes, Sir."

Homare immediately went for the phone and before handing them to Kanou, he made sure that the person on the other line, already picked up.

As usual, Kanou disregarded all formalities and went for the problem itself. "HEY OLD MAN, HAVE YOU BEEN KEEPING AN EYE ON AYASE?"

"Uhm, yyyess, Sir."

"DON'T YOU DARE LIE TO ME, WILSON! ARE YOU KEEPING AN EYE ON HIM?"

"Actually Sir, I...I...lost track of him."

...

"WHAAAAAAAT? SINCE WHEN?"

"Since the moment you..."

SLAM

"Homare, have this person fired this instance and ask him to pay me back his three years worth of salary or there will be hell to pay."

"Hai."

* * *

"Oh, you sure have a hand in doing these kinds of things. I must say I'm impressed."

"Thank you, Madam."

"Could you help me undress so that I could already prepare for bed?"

"Sure, madam."

"By the way, please stop calling me madam, just call me Akane. By the way, can the rest of you leave Hikaru and me alone, I need to speak to her in private."

Without further ado, everyone was out of the room except for Akane and Ayase.

"I have a proposal for you, Ms. Hikaru."

...

"I want to invite you to become my personal maid during the engagement ceremony which will be held in a few days. I noticed how good you are with designing and all that stuff, and I have strong faith that you'll be able to do your job well."

"Uhm..." _Oh shoot, I can't say no to her._

"I want you to make sure that my every need is attended, especially when it comes to my dress."

"O..okay"

"Good, you can go now if you don't have any more questions."

* * *

"Hikaru-chan !, You have no idea how lucky you are! Not only will you get to help the madam but you'll get to meet with the master face to face.

"Wwwhaat?"

"It's only natural since you are going to accompany the madam wherever she goes."

Ayase could already feel a headache coming up.

* * *

"Shachou, I've already searched throughout the employees' records and none of them goes by the name of Ayase. With regards to his lookalike, there's a lot of young maids and menservants who have long blonde and blue eyes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes Sir"

"Good, but now, we have another problem."

"I understood, Sir. I already dispatched a search team to look for him."

"Thanks, Kuba."

Homare then bowed down before leaving his boss with his work.

Kanou sighed as he reread the letter that Mr. Etsuko sent which says that he wanted the wedding to happen as soon as possible. If that's the case, they have to be engaged in a few days time so that they could proceed with the wedding preparations. _Hmmph,, my future father-in-law doesn't actually trust me enough that I am sincere with my intentions of marrying his daughter._

Truth to be told, he wasn't actually pressured by the sudden change in schedule. What he was actually pissed of is the line that states:

_Oh by the way, I would appreciate it if you would sleep in the same bedroom with my daughter and do all the things that a real husband and wife does after the engagement. For in this way, I could already start making a statement that both of our companies had already merged so that our value in the stock market would increase as early as now. _

_Stingy old man... I told him that the merging will occur on the day of the wedding itself. Very smart, very smart indeed. I actually agreed with his proposal but I'm not sure if I'm already ready to sleep with someone else..._

_Especially...if I still haven't gotten over him yet._

_

* * *

_Few days later...Engagement Day

Ayase was busy running errands the whole day that he could feel his muscles aching. _I wonder how long will I last. The party has not yet even started and I feel like dozing off. _

He was snapped out of his musings as he heard the crowd's reactions at seeing his mistress.

There were a lot of "ohhs" and "aahs" out of pure admiration or just a way of showing off that they all approve of the engagement.

"Akane-san, this way please."

"Thank you, Hikaru."

After few minutes had passed, the lights were slowly dimmed which signals that the headmaster is about to come out. Immediately, the whole ballroom thundered from the sound of clapping hands as Kanou Somuku presented himself to the crowd.

Needless to say, Ayase felt his heart stopped.

* * *

Kanou made a quick scan of the crowd in front of him. He could feel their stares and judgmental looks as he was slowly descending the staircase. _Okay, perfect, at least the old geezers are present...I don't want to held another party just to make up for their absences._

_

* * *

_Ayase could feel himself hyperventilating. His rationality was already shut down and he couldn't think of any better thing to do. _RUN RUN RUN..._

With that in mind, he scurried pass the crowds and went straight outside. _I have to get OUT OF HERE!_

Meanwhile, the short confusion did nothing to affect the vibrant atmosphere of the party. But if anyone were to look carefully at the headmaster's eyes, a mixture of shock and pain could be seen etched within those obsidian depths.

* * *

When the guests were all gone...

"Kanou-san, now the night's almost over, I believed I owe you an apology for what happened a while ago."

"Don't worry about it. I completely understand, Akane-san."

"Hmm..I promise you that girl would not be able to get away especially after what had happened tonight."

"Hnnn..."

"So Somuku-san," she seductively made her way towards him, "shall you carry Mrs. Kanou towards our room."

* * *

"What happened there?"

"Gomen ne, Mr. Bon, I I didn't mean to run away like that."

"Damn it! You should have been more composed! I've never expected you to behave like this before."

"I'm sorry I'm sorry," Ayase was bowing down on the floor as low as he can, "I promise I will make it up to you."

"You better do so, or else I would lose face in front of the..."

"That's enough, Mr. Bon!"

"But Mama, this boy right here just put to shame..."

"Oh for crying out loud, can't you see he is already embarrassed and shaken up as it is? He shouldn't be even there in the first place, if not for your incompetence!"

"I'm sorry, Mama."

"It's okay, I understand...but nevertheless, the party was a success, thanks to you but still, we have to answer to the mistress, especially poor Hikaru."

"Hikaru?"

"Yes Mama?"

"We'll talk about this later. For now, we must go back to the mistress."

"Hhai, is she mad at me?"

"Not really, she adores you too much to stay mad at you for long although, she was really disappointed with what happened tonight."

"I understand."

* * *

"Here we are, Hikaru."

"Mama, I thought the mistress' room is on the other wing?"

"Ayase, after the engagement, the headmaster and the mistress are suppose to sleep together."

...

"Ayase-kun, please hurry up and go inside. Remember your place as the madam's personal maidservant, you must carefully assist her, especially this is her first night. Plus, the headmaster is there with her. What happened tonight will totally be forgotten if you presented yourself well before the master and the mistress."

He could feel tears pricking at the back of his eyes. A combination of several emotions were gripping his heart, crushing it and left him suffocating. Fear, jealousy, confusion...

"Are you okay? I can take your place if you like."

"No, I'm I'm,"

_I have to do this! I have to do this!_

"I'm all set."

* * *

A/N: Reactions? hehe, the story's almost over. I sincerely hope that I could end this story with a BIG BANG! Meaning, that you guys will enjoy it 'til its very completion!


	5. Chapter 5: Unattainable

Chapter 5: Unwanted Realizations

"Hikaru-kun, what are you waiting for? You've embarrassed me enough for tonight, are you going to embarrass me further by not doing your job as the proper maidservant. You ought to be ashamed of yourself!"

"Gomen..I'm sorry," he then scurried in front of his mistress, careful not to trip on his own dress.

"Alright Hikaru, I didn't mean to sound rude but I have to show off to my future husband that I am not like most of the women he had dated in the past. He has to see me as the strong headed and independent type or else, there is a chance that he might brainwash me so that I could convince my father to surrender our family's business to him."

"NO, Kanou-san isn't like that!" Ayase realizing his outburst, hurriedly apologized to the woman in front of her.

Akane smiled. "I'm glad I chose you as one of my personal maidservant. I love people like you who still knows how to trust people. At the end of the day, I simply wanted to be free of people who are always busy plotting their next move just to get ahead of others. When I first saw you, I know that you are someone whom I could trust and share my personal stories."

"Uhm, thank you." Ayase felt himself blushing from the compliment. At that moment, he felt bad that he was lying to her.

"No problem, when we are both alone, no need to act stiffly since I am officially your friend now."

"Madam, there is simply no need for you to treat me this way especially after I've ruined the night for you."

"I begged to differ. I admit that I wasn't exactly angry with you with what happened tonight but believe it or not, I was grateful that you did that."

Ayase stared at her as if she had grown a second head.

"If there's one thing that you must know about me is that I don't really fancy occasions and gatherings since they are too orchestrated and too boring for my taste. A distraction once in a while is utterly welcome. I believe I'm not the only one who felt the same. Notice that almost a fourth of our guests this evening were youngsters who would rather be anywhere else but here. Thanks to you, they were given unexpected entertainment."

Ayase's could feel himself heating up. _After all these years, I am still a walking joke without meaning to but I'm glad that I made her happy. No one has ever treated me with this much respect before and I somehow felt bad that I am unintentionally lying to her._As he was smoothing out the silky fabric of the nightdress, a hand gently stopped him.

"Hikaru-kun, you may now retire to the servant's quarters. I will take over from here."

* * *

In his lifetime, Kanou Somuku never thought that the day would come when the idea of going to bed to have sex was utterly sickening. In the past, he always enamored every single girl that caught his eye and would no doubt have his way with them afterwards. Akane is not exactly unattractive. As a matter of fact, she is stunning with her fair skin, high cheekbones, smooth curves, long legs and other attributes that would certainly hypnotized every man on this planet. But what really caught his attention was the sad reality that this girl doesn't have blond hair and that the color of her eyes is not cerulean.

Akane has been touching him since they left the party. He thought she would get tired with her attempts after unsuccessfully eliciting even a single response from him. He was mistaken for it only served to make the woman more determined to seduce him. He sighed in irritation and decided to give the woman what she wanted so that he could finally get this over with.

However, as he waited for her to get ready for bed, he cannot help but noticed the maidservant who is by her side. He kept on staring at her until finally, they both entered his personal bathroom, which he will now share with his fiance, he noted with irritation.

Finally, after an hour of waiting, not that he was in any hurry, the door leading to his bathroom opened...a lady emerged who is definitely not her fiance.

"Ayase?"

Ayase tensed but quickly caught himself. "I'm here to inform you that my lady will be ready in a short while." He then headed straight for the door.

"Sorry young one, you just reminded me of someone in the past," Kanou murmured

Ayase pretended not to hear that.

Before Kanou can comment any further, the maidservant is already gone. He sighed and decided to just focus on what is in front of him. His wife is now standing in front of him with a triumphant smile edged at the corners of her lips. _Now back to business. _

He proceeded to lift her gown and started caressing the lower leg and slowly, going higher until he could reach the hips. He tried teasing her by lightly touching her underwear and immediately, inserted his fingertips inside her without warning. He certainly wished for this to end so he didn't bother teasing her further.

Akane was looking at him triumphantly, which infuriated him. _Hmm..so you think this is all a game? Let me show you how cruel I can be when being played at._

With a new-found determination, he increased the pace of his thrust with the intent of reducing her to a quivering mess but not enough to make her cum.

He looked into her eyes, silently challenging her to beg for him. He smiled evilly as he noticed that her eyes are slowly becoming dilated and her breath coming in short gasps. _Interesting, I must say this woman is more alluring than I initially thought._ He licked her earlobe and deliberately breathed before whispering to her. "You know it wouldn't hurt for a noble woman like you to beg a gentleman to stop teasing."

He received a glare in return, which is no surprise for him. "Oh, what a stubborn girl, just like your father..if you think that you could stop me from taking over your company then you are gravely mistaken, my lady."

Needless to say, the glare increased tenfold. "You won't get what you want that easily, Mr. Kanou." Without warning, she undid his tie and yanked the button studs from his shirt. She proceeded to touch the muscular expanse of his chest, making it appoint to lightly brush her fingertips against his nipples, no doubt having her revenge for his earlier teasing.

_Feisty. Not bad, not bad at all. _Kanou thought with a smirk.

They both continued with their ministrations. Teasing, groping and touching each other, keeping their eyes glued to each other. Each wanting to see who will be the first to falter, lose and succumb to the charm of the other.

Finally, there was an unexpected knock on the door. Out of instinct, both immediately stopped with their ministrations and proceeded to straighten their clothing.

"Come in." It was Akane who gave permission.

There was a faint creak as the door was being opened. Kanou was a little pissed that someone dared interrupted their little game. As he heard the door closed, he suddenly had an idea. Poor Akane as she was caught off guard when Kanou lifted her so that she was sitting on his lap and then tore her dress. He held both of her arms captive so that she would be rendered helpless. She moaned loudly as she felt his fingertips stroking her clitoris with her panties still on.

"Kanou-san, stop this game this instant. Don't you know that we have a guest?"

"So what? If you are embarrassed so be it. I just happened to spot an opportunity that will make you a sure loser in this game of ours."

They could both feel a pair of eyes staring at them, however, Akane was too overwhelmed with the pleasure coursing through her body to even care. Kanou was silently congratulating himself for not only winning the game but for also embarrassing her in front of their guest, whoever he or she maybe.

A few minutes passed and it was over. Akane's heated glare could almost scorch anyone alive but it only made Kanou grinned widely. "I guess I win."

"Screw you! That was low."

"I beg your pardon my lady, but in our field of profession, looking for a weak spot in your opponent is an everyday occurrence."

Akane smiled mischievously. "Of course, Mr. Kanou, this is just a game to both of us. I'm glad you thought of this arrangement that way." With that, she disentangled herself from him, blew him a mocking kiss and went to prepare for bed.

Kanou sighed after her fiance left his side. _I guess this is the beginning of my happy ever after. _He thought sarcastically.

But despite what just happened, both found each other less annoying and more interesting than ever. "You know something, we make a pretty good team." As they were happily conversing, both failed to notice their visitor who has been there the entire time.

Ayase's heart was beating so fast the entire time. He heard everything and has seen the way his mistress and Kanou interacted with each other. He knew what was going to happen that night. _Kanou's there, it is him, He did call me by my name right? He does remember me!_

Given this realization, he suddenly felt bold enough to barge in and claimed what is rightfully his. _I must stop them, I must win him back. But what about the mistress? _

_No, no, I'm not going to be the weak person that I once was. I would fight if I have to. I finally found him and I won't lose him again. _With that thought in mind, he determinedly knocked on the door.

But what he failed to realize is that no amount of courage could prepare him for the sight of his lady and former lover coming undone in each other's arms.

He immediately recoiled and slowly turned away with one thought coursing through his head. _He didn't even stop._

* * *

Ayase is staring blankly at the scenery in front of him. He is trying to calm himself down by taking solace at the West Garden of the mansion, but he simply felt too tired to move and to care for himself. The events of the night are weighing him down that it felt like the burden of the entire world is being placed upon his shoulders. _And here I thought that this is the best job I've ever had. _

"Hikaru-chan, what are you still doing here? It's already past 11 pm. Did the mistress want you to bring her tulips again?"

No response. She sighed and hugged the beautiful but dejected boy who she came to treat like her own child.

"Mama," Ayase simply broke down and cried.

"Do tell me, child, what's bothering you? You have to at least tell me so that I would be able to help you."

"Mama, do you promise not to tell anyone?"

"Of course dear. You know that you can trust your sisters and I or else, everyone by now, would know about your gender issues."

Ayase smiled at the implied joke.

They sat there for a while as Ayase started with how he met Kanou-san and how they ended up as lovers. Mama tried her best not to react and be judgmental on what Ayase endured under their headmaster's care, but Ayase assured her that it is all in the past. She could see the mixed emotions that the boy in her arms is feeling as he narrates his relationship with Kanou.

"I must say Ayase, I'm shocked to hear that you are the master's lover."

"I used to be." Ayase corrected.

"But do you still want to have him back?"

"I don't know. I still can't believe that he tricked me, fooled me and made me look crazy. He created a world wherein he supposedly doesn't exist. I felt so betrayed and confused."

"Hush now."

"Do you love him still?"

"Very much. But I don't think I'm ready to have him in my life again. All I know is that it hurts to see him with someone else."

"Ohh my dear child," she hugged him tightly, offering the best comfort she could provide.

They stayed like that for several minutes until Ayase spoke, "Mama, I want to leave this place and never return. I want to forget him this time for good."

* * *

The Following Day

"What? You are resigning? Did something happen yesterday? Was I too rough when I scolded you for your mistake? Hikaru-chan, I'm sorry I didn't mean to be that rude. I was just nervous about the upcoming night."

"No, madam, it's just that I realize that I wanted to see more of the world outside," he lied. _In truth, he just wanted to be united with his Kanou-san more than anything. _But yesterday night proved to be too difficult for him. No, it proved to be suicidal for him. It was a wake up call for him that no matter how much he love his job and mistress, he couldn't endure to be witness to such marital activities. The thought was painful enough but nothing could compare to the one he witnessed yesterday. He could feel his heart being torn into pieces as the scene of his Kanou-san giving pleasure to someone else other than him. The imagery kept on replaying in his head ever since and he felt his heart break even more.

"Hikaru-chan, is everything alright? Did you sleep well yesterday? You seem to be going through a lot. Do tell me what troubles you and perhaps, I could be of help."

_Kanou-san is the only one who could help me._

* * *

Homare sighed in frustration. Since yesterday night, his boss gave him another impossible task and that is for him to spy on the maidservant's quarters and interview people close to Hikaru-san.

_**Flashback**_

"What? You still haven't found Ayase? How can we be sure that he is safe? What if

"Sir, if you would kindly tell me the reason for such doubts, perhaps, I would be more efficient in my search."

"The mistress' maidservant."

"I'm sorry?"

"The mistress's personal maidservant has similar features that of Ayase."

"Sir, please reconsider such presumptions; the mistress' maidservant is a girl."

"I DON'T CARE, SEARCH THROUGH HER STUFF AND EVERYONE SHE KNOWS AT THIS MANSION AND REPORT TO ME WITHIN THE DAY."

_**End of Flashback**_

Homare massaged his forehead in irritation. _I should be in my room at this very moment, enjoying a quiet evening and yet, I'm here in the servants' quarters_, about to conduct a Q & A with people I barely interact with.

"Mr. Homare, to what do I owe the pleasure of being visited by the master's most trusted servant?"

"I apologize for troubling you this late, but I do want to ask you some urgent questions."

"Sure, go ahead."

"I believe that Hikaru Kohaku is under your care, am I right?"

"Yes, she is the newly hired and the mistress' personal maidservant."

"Do you happen to feel that there is something out of place with Hikaru-san?"

"Where in particular, may I ask?"

Homare looked at her, deciding at that moment that if he were to trust someone, he might as well trust this lady, who has been serving them without fault and complete loyalty. _Might as well take my chances just to get this over with._

"Look Mama, I know this may sound ridiculous, but the master sent me here to investigate Ms. Kohaku. He thinks that Ms. Kohaku is not being honest about her gender identification." _Not only is this hard but it is damn right awkward. Seriously? an investigation about someone not telling their real gender! If I don't know the master any better, I would say that this is the most absurd case I have ever handled and what a waste of precious time. God knows I'm no fool and I know exactly why the master is obsessed about this case. _

"Pardon me, Mr. Homare but I assure you that Mr. Bon and I are very strict when it comes to discriminating between our male and female servants. If she even displays signs of belonging to the other gender, I would personally take matters into my own hands. After all, we cannot risk a male pervert lurking in our midst."

Deciding not to object any further, Homare nodded, "thank you mama for your time. It seems like the master has mistaken Ms. Kohaku for someone else."

Just when they are about to exchange their regards and retreat for the night, Micah and Clarice came barging in. "WHERE IS HIKARU-CHANNNN?"

The girls failing to realize that they have a guest that evening, blurted out unanimously without thinking.

"WHY DOES **HE** WANT TO RESIGN?

Micah immediately covered her mouth, realizing what they had just said. Clarice, on the other hand, seems to be confused at her friends' reaction, but after her gaze landed on their mama and their visitor's widened eyes, her confusion turned to nervousness.

Homare NOW knew one thing...Hikaru is a guy. The expressions on every one's faces only further proved that he did not misheard things.

* * *

A/N: I know that I am in no position to make promises about my exact schedule to finish this story, but I will really try to work and provide more entertainment reading for you guys. I just started re-organizing my life and happily included fanfiction writing as part of my life for the next few years. Anyway, THANK YOU so much for the support especially during my long break from fanfiction.


	6. Chapter 6: Mending the Past

Chapter 6: Mending the Past

Everything made sense now, thought Homare Kuba as his mind immediately went to overdrive. Hikaru is Ayase. Kanou-san's presumptions are true indeed.

"Mama, tell me where is Hikaru now? I must bring him to the master."

As expected, there was no response.

Homare insisted. "It is important that they meet and reconcile things between them once and for all. This has cause people close to both of them enough trouble and headache that can last for more than a lifetime."

The kind old lady nodded in understanding. "West Garden is his usual hang out place."

Without pre-amble, Homare stormed out of the quarters, eager to resolve everything by the end of the night.

He spotted Ayase at the West Garden, wearing his usual white attire, without the dress and girlish hairstyle. He slowly approached the figure, careful not to startle the effeminate boy, "Ayase?"

Blue, round eyes turned to look at him, shocked for a moment but immediately regained his composure. "Why?"

…..

"Why are you doing this to me? Why is he doing this to me?"

"Ayase, I know that…Kanou-san has reasons for doing this."

"I I don't know if I could trust him again. I want to run away and never see him again but I can't let him go. I hate him but it is difficult for me to leave his side."

"If it were any consolation, you were not the only one who suffered great distress over this entire charade. I have to lose my twin brother over this whole fiasco that the master conjured. Ayase please come with me, I need you to see him. You are the only one who can pierce right through that thick skull of his. You are the only one who can make him see sense."

"I don't know if I can, Homare-san. He has already moved on, has a lovely wife…", Ayase's eyes begin to water as he recalls the instances wherein Kanou and his mistress had an intimate interaction. "She is just perfect for him, unlike me."

Homare sighed. He understood where the young boy's insecurities are coming from. Judging from the boy's background, he never really had someone who loved him unconditionally. There is always something that the boy must offer for people to accept him, resulting in self-depreciation and lose of self-worth. When his master first bought Ayase from an auction, Homare felt pity for the young man. Ayase craved love almost as if his very life depended on it that he allowed himself to be sold by his very own relative. His master may have loved Ayase, but he has a weird way of expressing his feelings to the point that it scared the hell out of the young man. Ayase's self destructive behavior and his shachou's aggressive pride lead them to this chaos. _ More like a tragic love story._

"Homare-san, there is no point in talking to him. He doesn't even feel the same way I do for him."

Hearing that coming from the mouth of his master's dear one, almost made him wanted to scream in frustration, but since it is not in his nature to do so, he simply said, "The more that you must go and have a real conversation with the shachou."

Meanwhile…

Kanou is currently not in his bedroom, which is not a surprise as it is not his habit to sleep with someone that he doesn't feel any attraction to. True, that his wife is beautiful but he doesn't feel lust or urge to sleep with her other than for power.

_Especially if a certain maidservant possesses roundish blue eyes._

"Darn, with the rate I'm going, I won't be at peace until I personally confront this girl."

Just then, a loud knock was heard, snapping Kanou out of his thoughts. _This better be important as nobody dares disturb me while I'm in my study unless they don't value their life._

He strode across the room and headed for the door with blasphemous words already at the tip of his tongue, more than ready to hurl them at the intruder who dared disturbed his solace.

As he was about to open his mouth to scold his right hand man, his not-so-kind words died down and morphed into a single word, "Ayase?"

The silence that followed proved to be deafening that Homare was forced to break it. "Shachou, you have a visitor. I shall take my leave now and leave you two alone to discuss your business."

And before Kanou and Ayase had any chance to react, the elder Kuba twin already disappeared.

None of them knew where to start and the awkwardness of the situation was almost suffocating. Finally one of them spoke, "Homare told me that you wish to see me." Ayase thought that the best way to approach this is to momentarily pass the blame to someone else.

"I was simply curious." Kanou replied nonchalantly. "You proved to be quite a sight dressed up as a girl."

Ayase could feel himself trembling, standing before him is the man who raped, tricked and used him for as long as he remembers but this is the very same man who treated him with kindness, understanding and love.

"Why?" he almost choked the words out, feeling tears at the back of his eyes, "Why are you doing this?"

Kanou didn't say anything. He honestly doesn't know what to say.

"Kka..nou-san, please answer me." His tone was soft and trembling as if he is the one at fault. But his mind is already made up. He will not stop until he gets his answers. He needs closure to this madness or he'll end up mad himself.

After hearing no answer from the man in front of him, his composure broke, spilling out years of locked up pain, torture and sadness. "SAY SOMETHING TO ME, YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING. HOW DARE YOU ACT AS IF EVERYTHING IS NORMAL, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME! I THOUGHT YOU WERE DIFFERENT FROM THEM, BUT NO, YOU TREAT EVEN WORSE THAN THEM. YOU PLAYED WITH MY FEELINGS, USED ME AS A SEX TOY AND THREW ME OUT THE MOMENT YOU GOT TIRED OF ME!"

Before he could blurt out his bottled up feelings any further, Kanou immediately wrapped his arms around Ayase's thin frame, pressed him tightly against his broad chest and rubbed circles around the young man's back, calming him down. But Ayase refuses to be comforted, he tried desperately to get out of the vice grip embrace that is keeping him captive, until finally he gave up and opted to pound hard on the older man's chest, trying to inflict as much as pain as he can." I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU."

Meanwhile, Kanou was silent as he listened to every word the man on his arms is saying. As he heard Ayase's claims of the suffering of what he went through, he decided right then and there that he will do anything to gain the forgiveness of the man he loves and that he will prove to him once more that above anything else, Ayase is the most precious person in his life. He will do everything that the young man wishes of him to. He will go as far as compensate him and give him the life that he always wanted before he came into his life. He will even admit his transgressions to the authorities and disappear from this precious one's life once and for all.

After a while of relentless sobbing and emotional breakdown, Ayase finally surrendered to sobbing quietly until he finally dozed off. Kanou could feel his chest throbbing from the onslaught of fists and pounds that he endured just now, but the pain is nothing compared to the amount of guilt that he is feeling now upon hearing his former lover's confession. But amidst everything that was said that night, he never forgot the last words that were uttered silently.

_You are just like them all! You made me believe that I am precious to you but you just abandoned me, like I am worth nothing, that I do not deserve you. _

It was then that he understood. Ayase doesn't need protection, money and other materialistic wealth that he has to offer. He just needs someone who can love him, for who he is, someone who cherishes him and is worth spending the rest of his life with. _Someone who doesn't treat him as a plaything._

His mind is still reeling from the recent happenings but at least now; he knows where to start and what to do with the situation. He feels grateful that Ayase cherishes his feelings for him and that was enough for him for now. He will do everything in his power to replace the pain with love and so much more. He hopes that one day both of them would get pass through this so that they could move on with their lives. But for the meantime, he will allow the young beauty in his arms to rest but not without whispering these words, "_In time, you will forgive me and we will spend eternity together filled with love."_

As he caressed the young man's hair, he permitted himself to doze off as well. _After all, I have my own confession to make._

Next morning

Ayase woke up to the feel of the soft mattress against his back. He felt so comfortable and at peace that he doesn't want to get up. He tried to recall the events of last night and as if caught red handed, he immediately sat up and scanned the room. It was then that he realized that he was not in the servants' quarters, rather he was in a overly spacious room that is lavishly decorated.

"You are finally awake?"

The young man was startled, but nevertheless, he recognized the voice of the man who plagued his every waking hour the past few days.

"You still look as adorable just like the last time I slept beside you." Kanou smirked at the shocked reaction he got from the blonde, but not wanting to scare the little one, "of course, I meant it in the literal sense."

There was silence for a while then Kanou decided that they have to finish what they have started last night. They needed to talk. It is the one thing that they never did even before when they were together. Their only way of communicating is to feel their way around each other, and hope that they do not end up offending the other. Kanou decided that if he wants to have another chance, another go at this relationship, he would have to learn how to communicate. He just hopes that Ayase feels the same. His outburst yesterday night proved to be the lengthiest conversation that the young man had with him.

"Ayase," he softly called out, hoping that the young man is eager to listen to him still, "I did what I had to do to protect you from myself." Seeing that he has the full attention of the boy, he continued, "I knew from the start that I would be forcing myself to you as I cannot have your heart. You were only with me as a slave and nothing more. You have no idea how much I hated the fact that I can only have you if I bought you as if you were some item that can be paid. I hated what I did back then, but I told myself that I'd rather have your body at the very least if I cannot have your heart."

Kanou scanned the young man's face the entire time for any reaction, but all his mind could process is the allure of those perfectly round blue eyes that are currently filled with pain and confusion. He had to snap himself back to reality to continue with his disclosure.

"At first, I was satisfied and happy but it was only for a short time, then I slowly see you reject me over and over again. I feel that each time you reject me, you take a part of me with you, leaving me empty inside. It was then that I began to realize that no matter how much I took advantage of you, I could never have you. I eventually decided to let you go."

At this point, Kanou is already kneeling beside the bed and gently grab the face of his beloved, daring him to look away as he pours his feelings to the young man for the first time. "I know what I did was wrong in so many ways, but believe me when I say this, leaving you is the most painful decision that I've ever made. During those times, I almost went crazy and I kept hearing your pleading voice as you lay there. I wasn't ready to let you go yet but seeing you begging for your freedom was enough motivation for me to turn my back on you and leave forever."

Ayase wanted to look away, the gaze of this man is too much as if he is trying to pierce his soul. He could feel himself tearing up once again from the heartfelt confession but decided that crying won't do him good, instead he tried his best to muster enough strength to respond to those words. "Kanou-san, listen to me onegai, during that time when you were about to leave, I wasn't pleading for my freedom, rather I was begging for you not to leave. You have no idea how difficult it is for me to see you there so near yet so unreachable. While it may be true that I was afraid of you at first, my feelings eventually changed and I started caring for you. For the first time, I felt happy that I could be with someone who cherishes me for who I am. I now…"

Ayase never got to finish what he was saying as his beloved kissed him for the first time in a long time. _Yes, he is now my beloved. I have realized that the hard way and I never want to let go._

After a while, they parted from each other but Kanou never stopped with his exploration of Ayase's body, which lead the both of them to conduct activities that require their presence inside the bedroom for the entire day.

Epilogue.

"Akane, I'm sorry but I'm glad you understood."

"Wait did I hear that right? The great Kanou Somuku apologizing?"

"Well you better heard it the first time coz there is definitely no second time."

"Somuku, please, there is nothing to be sorry about. The fact that you reconciled with the boy is enough reason for me not to hate you. It just goes to show that you have a heart somewhere there."

"Thank you, Akane. I certainly owe you one. Believe me, if I don't have anyone I like right now, I would have no doubt fell in love with you a long time ago."

"And I would no doubt, hate you still. Just do me a favor and talk to my dad, I don't want to be at the receiving end of his anger. You know how strongly he feels about our marriage."

Kanou sighed but agreed nonetheless. After all, whatever challenges or stressful days he has to go through, he will always have something to look forward to when he gets home.

A/N: Finally the story has come to an end and I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone for your support, reviews and patience. Now that I am finished with this piece, I shall now move on in completing my two other stories, which of course, are yaoi in nature, namely Adoption and Watching You Go. Two stories based on Code Geass and Junjou Romantica respectively. Hope to receive your support in these two works of mine. Oh by the way, I do not claim to be perfect in my writings, so feel free to send me private messages pertaining to grammatical errors especially. Once again, thank you so much!


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